Speechless...

Every time Jenni and I talk about what transpired yesterday particularly the way you showered us with your love and care we have been left speechless. As I read each of your notes in our guest book last night I thanked God with eyes full of tears for you have helped us to see how Christ has been exalted during this time. We are grateful to God for your frienship and were overwhelmed by the countless ways all of you demonstrated your love for our family yesterday! Thank you! IT WOULD BE IMPOSSIBLE FOR US TO COMMUNICATE WHAT IS IN OUR HEARTS FOR ALL OF YOU! WE TRUST THAT YOU KNOW THE LOVE WE HAVE FOR EACH OF YOU. THANK YOU!

Many of you commented on the slideshow and made requests to obtain what I said yesterday. I am currently working on getting the slideshow up, but in the meantime here is the manuscript that I spoke from.

Psalm 23.6 says “surely His mercy and goodness shall pursue me all the days of my life and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.” This verse has been the theme and reason for why we chose to name our treasured infant son Chase. For God’s mercy and kindness have chased our son and he will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

Chase Miller Smith was born on Monday November 6 at 11.56 AM. He was built just like his older brother Carson; he had a thick chest and broad shoulders, his legs looked like little redwood trees, and he had crazy dancing feet just like little buddy. Our family loved to have family dance parties after dinner and Chase would always pull out some rad dance moves in his momma’s belly – he was a precious gift to us and we miss him so much.

The Psalmist says, “Behold, children are a gift from the Lord.” And, “children’s children are the crown of old men.” The Bible passionately proclaims that children are great gifts from God, for “like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one’s youth. Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them.

I have heard it said that few joys match the joy that children bring to a family. Even fewer things rival the deep sorrow of a family that loses a child. At 27 and 28 years old my wife and I have known both. We have been blessed by the life of Carson and have had our hearts pierced by the death of our treasured infant son, Chase.

God gave us four hours with Chase that we treasure beyond words. We saw him smile, and try to talk, he was able to meet his family and so many that have loved him from the moment they were told of his life. We sought to comfort Chase in every way that we could. We kissed him, sang to him, and told him about Jesus over and over again. But his body began to quickly shut down until Monday afternoon when his symptoms became even more alarming, and then he passed away at 3.45PM. A half-hour before he died his momma began singing to him and soon after his dada jumped right in. We sang about the place where the streets shine with the glory of the lamb. Then we sang the gospel song to him over and over again. And then we ended with It Is Well With My Soul. Chase died in his dada’s arms right after we finished the last line of this song.

Jenni and I prayed countless times for God to glorify Himself by miraculously restoring our son’s body or to spare us from watching our son suffer and die while we embraced him – He did neither. Instead he blessed us with a son destined for glory that has left us with more of God and a deeper understanding of Calvary.

Chase, my dear son. Though you lived for only a few short hours the impact that your life has left on us is greater than what many could not even do in ten lifetimes.

We have seen the glory of Christ and treasure His work on our behalf more now than we ever have before. We have seen the depths of the Father’s love for us in ways that have taken our breath away. I have learned more of how to love your momma like Christ loves the church in these past 9 months than I have in all of the four years that we have been married. Though we are walking through the valley of weeping right now it has been so good for us because we have seen and learned wondrous things from God’s Word. We have heard God speak to us and we treasure His Word more than millions of gold and silver pieces. God has humbled us and taught us to boast in our weaknesses for we have seen that it is here that Christ’s glory is most clearly seen. We have encountered selfless acts of love and servant hood that have so clearly revealed the love of the Father. Through your life and death God has built and established friendships we cherish more now than we ever have before. Lastly, we have been driven to dream deeply about heaven.

We know that “of such is the kingdom of heaven” and though we mourn your departure we know that you are far happier with Jesus than you would be with us. We know that we now have a child among the angels – to whom we will soon go.

I have often wondered what awaited you on the shores of glory land. Maybe one of the loving angels that carried you to heaven has been teaching you the glories of Calvary. Maybe you have been given to your great grandfather and mawmaw, or to your aunt Abbie to keep until we can embrace you again. Maybe Jesus has told you of his design for your life and of your parents that love you and miss you so much. Perhaps you have observed your momma and dada grieving your passing and have wanted to comfort us by saying “come to Jesus dada, cry to Jesus momma, fly to Jesus and live.”

Chase, though we will soon lay you to rest we triumph for we are sure that your little infant voice has begun to sing the praises of our Savior. We are certain that now you are in Christ’s house and under His gentle care. Now we feel as never before the greatness of Christ’s sovereign grace and divine blood that has ransomed our treasured son and by whose stripes you are healed.

We love you my son and though you will not return to us we will go to you.

We love you,

Dada, Momma, and Carson.